Photo by Evil Robot 6, on Flickr.

Heeeeeeey youuuuuuu guuuuuuys, guess who had the lamest Gay Pride EVAH? This betch. I woke up at 3 o’clock Sunday morning to agonizing period cramps (a day late, because OF COURSE THAT IS HOW MY BODY WORKS), took Ibuprofen and Tylenol and half of a crumbling old Xanax (2012 prescription) and got out of bed at 8 tired, cranky, and crampy.

The situation improved mildly over at the Maltby Cafe, where after waiting 45 minutes for a table I stuffed my gullet with Swedish pancakes drizzled in powdered sugar and smothered in butter and syrup, but then worsened after a pathetic 20 minute walk with the dogs. Pride parade was not happening that day. Absolutely nothing was happening that day, except swallowing Midol and chocolate and Pringles at regular intervals, horizontal on the loveseat with my mother’s heating pad from the 70’s across my mid-section. Oh, oh oh OH how I miss birth control. Seriously, if I haven’t gotten knocked up by the time I’m, er, 40, I’m going right back on that pill. Okay, body? 5.5 more years of this bullshit, and then it’s pill time!

This is the adorable outfit I picked out the night before to wear to the Parade, DAMMIT. Oh well. I’m hoping to wear it to First Thursday this week with Joshy, since it’s been years since we’ve gone to one of those, and I need some art inspiration, big time!

In other news, the weather today is so stinkin’ fabulous my post-work walk with the pets almost made up for missing the parade yesterday. Tomorrow is supposed to be 88 degrees! 8-8! You go, Seattle weather.